Thirty Before Thirty

So despite all of my best efforts and experimentation, time continues to march frustratingly forward.

Mark it: in 44 days' time, I shall turn *gulp* thirty years old.

Frankly I'm not very fond of this fact. I'd much prefer it was a statistic. You can use statistics to prove anything. Believe me, I work in and around politicians. Statistics can be your best friends if you stroke them the right way. Much like dogs. And politicians.

If my forthcoming birthday were a mere statistic, then I could statistically tell you that it is only a probability that I will shortly be leaving my twenties. But no, my birthday, much like my dear mother's labour pains and my dear father's aversion to latex, it is a cold, hard fact.

But hey, enough of the cloying faux-tragic sighing, right? Let's look 30 right in the face, and before it can say "Wrinkles, bee-atch", punch it right in the balls.

I'm going to do 30 new things before I turn 30.

And guess what? (Here's the call to action part of the narrative) I need YOUR help!

I'm going to compile a list. There are a few things that I personally want to do/try, but for the most part I'm open to suggestion. Now the point of this exercise is NOT to do every bogus extreme activity known to man. The point is for me to try things that I have so far avoided - either accidentally or on purpose - for the past 29 and a bit years.

So here are some examples of things I'm going to do:

• Have Dan make me a cup of tea, and drink it with him (Dan is obsessed with the fact I've never drunk tea).
• Drink alcohol to the point of legal intoxication (I am not a drinker).
• Watch an "adult film" in its entirety (The Wah suggested I get DiscoStu involved, and review it, in the style of our Buffy/Xena musical episode review. When I explained to Stu what I was doing, he said "So Dan's the tea guy, and I'm the porn guy?" I replied that Dan's so obsessed with freaking tea that he'll probably prepare the damn stuff in the nude anyway, so really, it's a compliment. Stu then accepted the challenge).

So! Ladies and gentlemen, I hand over to you. You can be as creative or as simple as you like. You could tell me to visit a suburb I've never been to, or read your favourite book. Maybe you'd like me to try an activity you've always wanted to try to report back on what it's like. Perhaps you'd like me to wear a particular item of clothing, or take a lesson in a martial art or dance style.

Obviously, you might suggest something that I have done (such as walk the Great Wall of China, go horse-riding in Mongolia or ask a nice Russian chemist for thrush medication), so apologies in advance for any rejections. I must also say that I won't do anything that will physically or mentally harm another person (unless it's agreed to by that person, for example, boxing etc). Some things will be precluded because of cost and time restraints. However, I AM going to Hong Kong tomorrow night for a few days, so I am happy to look at things over there that I could do.

And before you ask, I probably WON'T get a tattoo, because I'm a big girly girl.

I should say I'm happy to do more than 30 things. But I've got around six weeks to get all this done, so 30 is my minimum. I'll keep track of progress on Twitter, using the hashtag #30before30.

I've actually already done my first activity - being in a flashmob. Yesterday I spent five hours learning a Bollywood dance, then joined about 30 others performing it flashmob style in King George Square. I'll write more about that later when the video becomes available, but for now here's a photo I nicked off Facebook:

That's me in the black pants & grey shirt.

Thanks to Paul for the photo.

Also, I would like to raise money doing this. I am going to work out a way of setting up a donate button, probably through PayPal. Hopefully if you enjoy reading about my adventures, you may consider donating something. I have decided to split any money that is donated between:

1) The Australian Red Cross, specifically for helping victims of the Pakistan floods. My grandmother, Queen Pat, worked for the Red Cross for over 40 years, so it's an organisation I like to support. Also, my great-aunt Monnie lives in Karachi, and has worked for the International Girl Scouts for many years. I know that more help is needed for Pakistan right now.

2) The Brisbane Arts Theatre. Because we never have ANY money. And we're a not-for-profit community group that SHOULD be around in 2011 to celebrate 75 years of great independent theatre.

Please note: Donations are NOT compulsory. I will look at all suggestions on their merit - but hey, maybe cash pledges will sway me.

Thanks again to everyone who reads Girl Clumsy - I hope to provide you with many interesting adventures to read about over coming weeks!